2018 in a nutshell

Years are just numbers. Though, they serve as a checkpoint for benchmarks or a reference point. Not gonna lie, it's a bumpy yet interesting year to say the least.

There are things that definitely need cracking down to ensure smooth operations throughout - and that means someone needs to be stern - even if it is frowned upon. To be stern is where people will start to hate me. Or even retaliate, for that matter.

In short, I'll volunteer to be the scapegoat. And that's okay. I need things to work out - not just give in to whatever minor excuse or complaint. I'm stressed, for fuck's sake. I can't tank.

I think it's okay to not have personal connection to anything or anyone. Everyone is just surviving to get by life anyway.

The "new year, new me" thing is not that applicable to me this time around. I'm going for "new year, old me" instead. Why? Because it sucks to be a soft-hearted. I still think it's better to be cold.

I tried to lower my guard since August of 2017. I remember that series of event and the triggers that happened. Seeing all the things that are happening, I thought things will be different. So I gave in, listened to my heart - and it was obviously the wrong choice. I got hurt once again.

My anger is overwhelming. Everything is turning back to what it was like in early 2017. Keeping my distance. No one to talk to, no one to hug, no one to have some boundless heart to heart talk. And now I'm loveless again.

For something to happen is to actually take action and do something. Don't expect everything to just happen and "go with the flow".
But like I said, it takes two to clap. If I do something and the other party doesn't do anything, then it's useless and pointless.

If you try to help someone, then take action. Don't sit and wait for something to happen miraculously - that's never going to happen. If you care, take action. Take actions that are hard-hitting, not just pointlessly beating around the bush. Simple as that.

Now that I'm back to keeping my distance, I dare you to try and catch up. This "paywall" can honestly be a legitimacy test.